joined: 2019-07-23
Just Smile :)
Next level: 
Points needed: 127

Dreamin a lil Dream my cover of Fleetwood Mac's song Dreams


I didn't make you

I didn't make you, I never carried you inside of me I never gave birth to you but I was there the day you were born and I loved you from that day on, never knowing one day I would be your Mom. From the time you were a tiny lil baby, I knew you were a part of my heart and from that day I knew you would do great things in this life, and you have I see them every single day
I held you. I fed you, I snuggled you every chance I got, I cherished my time with you never knowing one day I would spend my life doing things to make you happy- and that would make me happy. You have filled a spot in my heart that needed filling, I never thought I would adopt again but God had other plans, and now were building a life you and me it not always easy but its worth it and I wouldn't trade you for the world a billion times over my Sweet Emma
And then there are the times I get frustrated but even in those times I know I never want to give up. I know it feels like your birth Momma gave up on you but the truth is she gave up on herself and it's our job yours and mine to never give up on her, because we lover her and know the old person is still in there and we pray she finds her way back to us before the drugs make us lose her forever,
You’ve made me rethink my sanity, to put all my focus on you and some days You’ve made me want to fall at my Nanas feet and tell her that I get it .As parents were not perfect were human we make mistakes and sometimes life is overwhelming But then you smile and you say my name….and you grab my hand and you giggle or say sumthin funny and I know its all gonna be ok becuz were in this together and We’re growing together.
We are seeing the world like it’s new. I've opened my heart and let every ounce of love in me rain down all over you,
And together we will walk thru this life together until you let go. I didn't make you you, but you made me a Mom again and for that I am beyond blessed

Happy 2022 Everybody

I don’t actually believe New Year’s Day is any different than any other day. I don’t believe a random point in the time measurement system we’ve created requires us to make a  list of things we need to change or improve. New Year’s Eve is, in fact, just another day, and the next day is one, as well. I don’t mean to minimize the excitement of the New Year, or any of the days we’ve chosen to celebrate for religious or honorary reasons. What I’m saying is that New Year’s resolutions often fail for a reason, and it’s only slightly related to intention or discipline .Resolutions fail because they don’t emerge from true breakthroughs or reasonings,,, They’re calendar-driven obligations. and they often address the symptoms, not the cause of our unhappiness or need for changes.. Some resolutions are smart for our physical and emotional health and well-being. Quitting smoking, losing weight, managing stress better  quit cussing,,,, ( just so you know  that has never been a resolution I knew I could keep for a whole year  )—most of these are all healthy things .But if we don’t address what underlies our needs to light up, order double bacon cheeseburgers, and worry ourselves into frenzies, will it really help to vow on one arbitrary day to give up everything that helps us pretend we’re fine? It’s almost like we set ourselves up for failure to avoid addressing the messy stuff. The stuff that makes us make all these resolutions, I can’t say this is true for everyone, but my experience has shown me that my unhappiness—and my need for coping mechanisms—come from several different places: I’m dwelling on the past or obsessing about the future .I’m comparing myself to everyone else—their accomplishments, the respect and the attention they garner, and their apparently perfect lives. I’m feeling dissatisfied with how I’m spending my time and the impact I’m making on the world. I’ve lost hope in my potential. I’m expecting and finding the worst in people. I’m turning myself into a victim or a martyr, blaming everyone else .I’m spiraling into negative thinking, seeing everything as a sign of doom and hopelessness ,I’m assuming there should be a point in time when none of the above happens anymore. The last one, I believe, is the worst cause of unhappiness. All those other things I mentioned are human, whether we experience them persistently or occasionally. We’ll do these things from time to time, and they’ll hurt. In the aftermath, we’ll want to do all those different things that every year we promise to give up, We’ll want to eat, drink, or smoke away our feelings. Or we’ll want to work away our nagging sense of inadequacy. Or we’ll judge whether or not we’re really enjoying life enough, and in the very act of judging detract from that enjoyment. So, perhaps the best resolution has nothing to do with giving up all those not-so-healthy things and everything to do with adopting a new mindset that will make it less tempting to turn to them .Maybe instead of trying to trim away all the symptoms of our dissatisfaction, we can accept that what we really want is happiness—and that true happiness comes and goes. We can never trap it like a butterfly in a jar. No amount of medication or meditation or drinking  can change the fact that we will sometimes get caught up in thoughts and emotions .It’s not about perfection or a complete release from all the causes of unhappiness. It’s about accepting that being human involves a little unhappiness—but how often it consumes us is up to us...all those things mean nothing if you’re not in the right head space to release the bad and enjoy the good, Resolve what you will this year, but know that happiness And peace should be our ultimate goal. It starts in daily choices, not  our yearly resolutions—on any day  we can decide to start, it's not always easy  the past has a way of trapping us  if not in body in  our minds, but were never gonna have a future if we don't let go and start new and every day brings us this chance  it may not me on Jan 1 2022 it may be weeks or months into the year, One day at a time one foot in front of the other is how I ny future my year ahead , no promises , no resolutions, I'm just gonna love those around me a lil more than the day before and more tomorrow, I'm gonna  be happy with life as it is and  not be so anxious about my future , and I'm gonna laugh even on the,bad days just like I have always done becuz no matter how much modern medicine there is in this world Laughter I truly think is the best one  For anyone who reads this I wish you  a year of whatever brings you happiness, its your life do what makes you happy not what makes everyone else happy, I hope you smile on the bad days , that you find innner peace  on the days of chaos and that you are surrounded by thosue you love and those who love you , because honestly I cant think of anything better for the coming year than that,,, Happy 2022 Everybody !!


Merry Christmas to you all :)

Can you believe it’s Christmas Day tomorrow? (And can you believe it’s almost 2022) Time needs to just slow down:) Christmas can mean a lot of different things to different people – a time to celebrate, a time for giving, a time to spend with friends and family. And besides the obvious reason to exchange and open gifts, it’s a reason to GIVE to the people that mean the most to you. If not a giving of a gift the giving of your time and friendship when they need it most,,, It can get easy to forget the real reason for the holiday and get lost in the pretty, shiny things that we want and wish for. It can get easy to caught up stressing about buying the perfect presents when in fact, the perfect presents are things that we already have been given throughout the year. Our families first and foremost, Our friends Our dogs Our freedom to live our lives as we wish, the freedom of prayer speech the freedom to love who we choose, and so so many things but Christmas is actually about celebrating how we have already received the very best gift of all with Jesus’ birth. Forgiving us of all our sins, and we all know were all a sinner at some time in our lives ,So this year, I started thinking about all the ‘gifts’ I’ve received that might be easily overlooked or lost in the mix of everyday life. It was easy for me to see that one of the very best gifts I have received this year has been meeting and making new friends on and off line some I know will be life time friends and some I care a great deal about ,So this Christmas, I am wishing you guys all the peace, love and joy that you have given to me this year. I hope your Christmas is filled with laughter and smiles and spend with the ones you love most! And to me, some of you guys mean the world to me,,,, and you have given me the gift of your friends ship all year long and for that I am thankful...Have a MERRY AND BLESSED CHRISTMAS my dear friends. Lots of love to you all...
Love Hope

Dear Friends.. ( did not write this ) but its hilarious :)

Dear Friends, My wife Toni is fond of saying that my last words on this earth will be something akin to, "hey y'all, hold my beer and watch this!" Well, I have outdone myself once again. No doubt you will see this true story chronicled in a LifeTime movie in the near future. Here goes. Last weekend I spied something at Larry's Pistol and Pawn that tickled my fancy. (Note: Keep in mind that my "fancy" is easily tickled). I bought something really cool for Toni. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my sweet girl. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Tazer gun with a clip. For those of you who are not familiar with this product, it is a less-than-lethal stun gun with two metal prongs designed to incapacitate an assailant with a shock of high-voltage, low amperage electricity while you flee to safety. The effects are supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, but allowing you adequate time to retreat to safety. You simply jab the prongs into your 250 lb. Tattooed assailant, push the button, and it will render him a slobbering, goggle-eyed, muscle-twitching, whimpering, pencil-neck geek. If you've never seen one of these things in action, then you're truly missing out—way too cool! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was so disappointed. Upon reading the directions (we don't need no stinkin' directions), I found much to my chagrin that this particular model would not create an arch between the prongs. How disappointing! I do love fire for effect. I learned that if I pushed the button, however, and pressed it against a metal surface that I'd get the blue arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs that I was so looking forward to. I did so. Awesome!!! Sparks, a blue arch of electricity, and a loud pop!!! Yipeeeeee . . I'm easily amused, just for your information, but I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave. Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-a batteries, etc., etc. There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul), reading the directions (that would be me, not Gracie) and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh and blood target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie for a fraction of a second and thought better of it. She is such a sweet kitty, after all. But, if I was going to give this thing to Toni to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong? Was I wrong to think that? Seemed reasonable to me at the time. . . So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, Tazer in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a loss of bodily control; a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. All the while I'm looking at this little device (measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference, pretty cute really, and loaded with two itsy, bitsy triple-a batteries) thinking to myself, "no friggin' way!" Friggin' way—trust me, but I'm getting ahead of myself. What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best. Those of you who know me well have got a pretty good idea of what followed. I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head cocked to one side as to say, "don't do it buddy," reasoning that a one-second burst from such a tiny lil' ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad (sound, rational thinking under the circumstances, wouldn't you agree?). I decided to give myself a one-second burst just for the hell of it. (Note: You know, a bad decision is like hindsight—always twenty-twenty. It is so obvious that it was a bad decision after the fact, even though it seemed so right at the time. Don't ya hate that?) I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY SHIT! DAaaaauuuuuuMN!!! I'm pretty sure that Jessie Ventura ran in through the front door, picked me up out of that recliner, then body slammed me on the carpet over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, soaking wet, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position. Gracie was standing over me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face, undoubtedly thinking to herself, "do it again, do it again!" (Note: if you ever feel compelled to mug yourself with a Tazer, one note of caution. There is no such thing as a one-second burst when you zap yourself. You're not going to let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. Then, if you're lucky, you won't dislodge one of the prongs 1/4" deep in your thigh like yours truly.) SON-OF-A-BITCH that hurt! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at this point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they get there??? My triceps, right thigh and both titties were still twitching. My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, as my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. give or take an ounce or two, I'm pretty sure. I'm
still looking for my testicles? I'm offering a significant
reward for their safe return. Still in shock,
Film at eleven....