NAPOLEON BONERPARTE

 
Nous a rejoint: 2015-05-14
Don't Look Back! You're Not Going That Way!
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Three Men and a River

Three Men and a River

Three men were hiking through a forest 

When they came upon a large raging, violent river.

Needing to get to the other side, the first man prayed:

'God, please give me the strength to cross the river.'
Poof!!!
God gave him big arms and strong legs.

And he was able to swim across in just two hours, though he almost drowned twice!
After seeing that, the second man prayed:

'God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river'
Poof!!!
God gave him a kayak and strong arms and strong legs.

And he was able to row across the river in about an hour, though he almost capsized once!
Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed:

'God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river'
Poof!!!
HE WAS TURNED INTO A WOMAN!!!
She then checked the map, hiked one hundred yards upstream

and walked across the bridge.


Smile

If this doesn't make you smile...you need to start the day over! some of these are very 'deep' and need to be heeded.... 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

JUST STAY

worried old man

**********

******

 

A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside.

 

“Your son is here,” she said to the old man.

 

She had to repeat the words several times before the patient’s eyes opened.

 

Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young uniformed Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man’s limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.

 

The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed. All through the night the young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man’s hand and offering him words of love and strength. Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the Marine move away and rest awhile.

 

He refused. Whenever the nurse came into the ward, the Marine was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital – the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients.

 

Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.

 

Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.

 

Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her.

 

“Who was that man?” he asked.

 

The nurse was startled, “He was your father,” she answered.

 

“No, he wasn’t,” the Marine replied. “I never saw him before in my life.”

 

“Then why didn’t you say something when I took you to him?”

 

“I knew right away there had been a mistake,

but I also knew he needed his son, and his

son just wasn’t here.

 

When I realized that he was too sick to tell

whether or not I was his son,

knowing how much he needed me, I stayed.”

 

I came here tonight to find a Mr. William Grey.

His Son was Killed in Iraq today, and I was sent to

inform him. What was this Gentleman‘s Name?

 

The Nurse with Tears in Her Eyes Answered,

Mr. William Grey………….

 

The next time someone needs you … just be there. Stay.

 


Cruising.

DEAR DIARY ... DAY ONE
My husband and I are all packed and ready to get on
the cruise ship. I've packed all my pretty dresses and
make-up. I'm really excited.

DEAR DIARY .. DAY TWO
We spent the entire day at sea. It was beautiful and
we saw some whales and dolphins. What a wonderful
vacation this has started to be. My husband spent most
of the day gambling. I met the Captain today and he
seems like a very nice man.

DEAR DIARY ... DAY THREE
I spent some time in the pool today. I also did some
shuffle boarding and hit some golf balls off the deck.
The Captain invited us to join him at his table for
dinner. I felt honored and we had a wonderful time. He
is a very attractive and attentive gentleman. My
husband spent more time gambling.

DEAR DIARY ... DAY FOUR
Went to the ship's casino ... did OK .. won about $80.
My husband wanted to stay and gamble more. The Captain
invited me to have dinner with him in his state room.
We had a luxurious meal complete with caviar and
champagne. He asked me to stay the night but I
declined. I told him there was no way I could be
unfaithful to my husband.

DEAR DIARY ... DAY FIVE
Went back to the pool today and got a little
sunburned. I decided to go to the piano bar and spend
the rest of the day inside. The Captain saw me and
bought me a couple of drinks. He really is a charming
gentleman. He again asked me to visit him for the
night and again I declined. He told me that if I
didn't let him have his way with me he would sink the
ship. I was appalled. My husband spent most of the
night gambling.

DEAR DIARY ... DAY SIX- My husband spent most of the
day gambling.
I saved 1600 lives today .... twice !!!!